It's waiting for you always ....

In the myst of

Love abound

is a place

seldom found.

In your dreams

it calls to you

to discover

this love anew.

For if you fail

to heed its call

what will be left

when you begin to fall.

-M. Page

Gone for a while, Sometimes, it seems, too hard to even crack a smile.

Everyday feels like a daily grind

If only it can be left beind

For a while

Then maybe I would choose

to smile.

Oh, how I would smile

from the tops of my ears

for the rest of my years.

But I can't.

Because that daily grind

never allows me to unwind.

-Page

How can I go on?

When this feeling

doesn't lead me to beyond?

Do I continue to hide and

feel ever lost

in this great divide?

-Page

Forever in a day

I find myself

lingering away.

If only I could find

myself

in a world full of

such wealth.

- Page

Starting over.

My body aches
my heart is broke
some day's seems as if
my life is an ongoing joke.

I don't know where im going
I sure as hell don't know where Im at
But I must go inside myself
and bring me back.

I've bottled myself up for so long
scared to face the unknown
afraid to open my eyes
to what I have been shown.

What have I done?
How stupid I have been
why won't this ache
ever end?

I am sorry, deeply sorry
both of us caved every bit
but, my dear, I know our love is so strong
we will get through it.

We broke each others hearts
let each other down
what must happen now
is to continue our path, only upward bound.

Send our love for one another
higher than its ever been before
into the clouds
where it can soar.

I love you my dear
with all my heart
I don't and won't
let anything, anymore drive us apart.

-Mp 11/14/2008

Things I would like to share...

To help east my mind, to ease the pain, I need to write to keep me sain.


- she struggles each and everyday
to redeem herself from the past
proving to family and loved ones
that this change will last.

-she dreads the time of turmoil
fearing she won't be strong
praying that when it happens
she won't be wrong.

-she reaches deep inside herself
to a place she needs to find
and grasp a shred of strength
to nuture her mind.

-some of us watch her battle
some have been in her shoes
we know this war is
something she must not lose.

-------------------------------------------------------

I lost myself

-someplace along the line
someplace so lost in time

I judged my footing wrong
and the rest of me just followed along

so I scrambled up to find me
and lost myself in a turbulent sea

but all is not lost, because I can see the sky
and I'll learn to swim, till I learn to fly.


----------------------------------------------

unknown

I always try to hide
the best of me
I don't put myself out there
for the world to see
Things that happen
I suppress
just between
I and me.
-Maja

Paint Brush

I keep my paint brush with me
Wherever I may go,
In case I need to cover up
So the real me doesn't show.
I'm so afraid to show you me,
Afraid of what you'll do - that
You might laugh or say mean things.
I'm afraid I might lose you.

I'd like to remove all my paint coats
To show you the real, true me,
But I want you to try and understand,
I need you to accept what you see.
So if you'll be patient and
close your eyes,
I'll strip off all my coats real slow.
Please understand how much it hurts
To let the real me show.

Now my coats are all stripped off.
I feel naked, bare and cold,
And if you still love me with
all that you see,
You are my friend, pure as gold.
I need to save my paint brush,
though, And hold it in my hand,
I want to keep it handy
In case someone doesn't understand.
So please protect me, my dear friend
And thanks for loving me true,
But please let me keep
my paint brush with me
Until I love me, too.

Written by ©Bettie B. Youngs

Something

by Raquel

And so it came to be
this isolation that I am
I can only look to me
to find the way it all began -
this confusion, constant
hunger for something more than this
I strive to find this being
that I envision, yet seem to miss.
Could it be that I am empty-
or maybe a little lost?
Could it be that I am lonely,
or seek happiness at any cost?
This never-ending Something
that I am living deep inside,
depicts the illusion of myself
and all I have to hide.


_____________________________________________________________________

I want to put myself out there
for the whole world to see
so that I may show the truthful me
I part of me
that so long to be
whole again
I have to hide
I have to suppress
I have to stay in a
constant state of silent unrest
I cannot stay this way
much longer
There comes a point
when I just say
Take all that I have
all that I am
I am done hiding
who I want to be
I am done with
those who all those
who suck the life out of me
I know there's more to this existence
beyond what the eye can see.

chatter

Who am I. Why am I here? What is my purpose?

we all have to ask ourselves at least one of these questions at one point in our life or another. So, do you know the answer? If you think you don't, your wrong. Think about it. why are you here? Who are you, and what is your purpose?

Realization and a true awakening

I have come to realize a few things that People and things come into my life for a reason. As I sit and ponder these astonishing things, I see that it is me who attracts these things to me; from my neighbor, to the establishment where I worked, down to my family. These things have taught me a great deal, on how to deal with certain situations and issue that have arisen in the past couple months. It has taken me a great deal of time to sort out issues that I have with myself. However, I still have a great deal of sorting to do. My "to-do" list is never done.

The Awakening
Sonny Carroll

There comes a time in your life when you finally get it... When in the midst of all your fears and insanity you stop dead in your tracks and somewhere the voice inside your head cries out- ENOUGH! Enough fighting and crying or struggling to hold on. And, like a child quieting down after a blind tantrum, your sobs begin to subside, you shudder once or twice, you blink back your tears and through a mantle of wet lashes you begin to look at the world from a new prospective.

This is your AWAKENING!

You realize that it is time to stop hoping and waiting for something, or someone, to change or for happiness, safety and security to come galloping over the next horizon. You come to terms with the fact that there aren’t always fairytale endings (or beginnings for that matter) and that any guarantee of "happily ever after" must begin with you.
Then a sense of serenity is born of acceptance.



So you begin making your way through the “reality of today” rather than holding out for the “promise of tomorrow.” You realize that much of who you are, and the way you navigate through life is, in great part, a result of all the social conditioning you’ve received over the course of a lifetime. And you begin to sift through all the nonsense you were taught about:

how you should look and how much you should weigh
what you should wear and where you should shop
where you should live or what type of car your should drive
who you should sleep with and how you should behave
who you should marry and why you should stay
the importance of having children or what you owe your family

Slowly you begin to open up to new worlds and different points of view. And you begin reassessing and redefining who you are and what you really believe in. And you begin to discard the doctrines you have outgrown, or should never have practiced to begin with.

Acceptance:

You accept the fact that you are not perfect and that not everyone will love, appreciate or approve of who or what you are... and that’s OK... they are entitled to their own views and opinions. And, you come to terms with the fact that you will never be a size 5 or a “perfect 10” Or a perfect human being for that matter. So you stop trying to compete with the image inside your head or agonizing over how you compare.

And you take a long look at yourself in the mirror and you make a promise to give yourself the same unconditional love and support you give so freely to others. Then a sense of confidence is born of self-approval.

And, you stop maneuvering through life merely as a “consumer” hungry for your next fix, a new dress, another pair of shoes or looks of approval and admiration from family, friends or even strangers who pass by. Then you discover that “it is truly in giving that we receive [1] and that the joy and abundance you seek grows out of the giving. And you recognize the importance of “creating” & “contributing” rather than “obtaining” & “accumulating.”

Gratitude:

And you give thanks for the simple things you’ve been blessed with; things that millions of people upon the face of the earth can only dream about a full refrigerator, clean running water, a soft warm bed and the freedom to pursue your own dreams.

Self-Regard:

You begin to love and to care for yourself. You stop engaging in self-destructive behaviors including participating in dysfunctional relationships. You begin eating a balanced diet, drinking more water and exercising. And because you’ve learned that fatigue drains the spirit and creates doubt and fear, you give yourself permission to rest. And just as food is fuel for the body, laughter is fuel for the spirit and so you make it a point to create time for play.

Love & Relationships:

Then you learn about love and relationships, how to love, how much to give in love, when to stop giving and when to walk away. And you allow only the hands of a lover who truly loves and respects you to glorify you with his touch. You learn that people don’t always say what they mean or mean what they say, intentionally or unintentionally and that not everyone will always come through and interestingly enough, it’s not always about you.

So, you stop lashing out and pointing fingers or looking to place blame for the things that were done to you or weren’t done for you. And you learn to keep your Ego in check and to acknowledge and redirect the destructive emotions it spawns; anger, jealousy and resentment.

You learn how to say I was wrong and to forgive people for their own human frailties.
You learn to build bridges instead of walls and about the healing power of love as it is expressed through a kind word, a warm smile or a friendly gesture.

And, at the same time, you eliminate any relationships that are hurtful or fail to uplift and edify you. You stop working so hard at smoothing things over and setting your needs aside. You learn that feelings of entitlement are perfectly OK and that it is your right to want or expect certain things. And you learn the importance of communicating your needs with confidence and grace.

You learn that the only cross to bear is the one you choose to carry and that eventually martyrs are burned at the stake.

Then you learn to distinguish between guilt, and responsibility and the importance of setting boundaries and learning to say NO. You learn that you don’t know all the answers, it’s not your job to save the world and that sometimes you just need to Let Go.

Moreover, you learn to look at people as they really are and not as you would want them to be, and you are careful not to project your neediness or insecurities onto a relationship. You learn that you will not be, more beautiful, more intelligent, more lovable or important because of the man on your arm or the child that bears your name. You learn that just as people grow and change, so it is with love and relationships and that that not everyone can always love you the way you would want them to. So you stop appraising your worth by the measure of love you are given.

And suddenly you realize that it’s wrong to demand that someone live their life or sacrifice their dreams just to serve your needs, ease your insecurities, or meet “your” standards and expectations.

You learn that the only love worth giving and receiving is the love that is given freely without conditions or limitations. And you learn what it means to love. So you stop trying to control people, situations and outcomes. You learn that “alone” does not mean “lonely” and you begin to discover the joy of spending time “with yourself” and “on yourself.”

Self-Love:

Then you discover the greatest and most fulfilling love you will ever know.
Self-Love. And so, it comes to pass that through understanding your heart heals; and now all new things are possible.

Changing Your Life For The Better:

Moving along, you begin to avoid Toxic People and conversations. And you stop wasting time and energy rehashing your situation with family and friends. You learn that talk doesn’t change things and that unrequited wishes can only serve to keep you trapped in the past. So, you stop lamenting over what could or should have been and you make a decision to leave the past behind. Then you begin to invest your time and energy to affect positive change. You take a personal inventory of all your strengths and weaknesses and the areas you need to improve in order to move ahead. You set your goals and map out a plan of action to see things through.

You learn that life isn’t always fair and you don’t always get what you think you deserve and you stop personalizing every loss or disappointment. You learn to accept that sometimes bad things happen to good people and that these things are not an act of God... but merely a random act of fate.

And you stop looking for guarantees because you’ve learned that the only thing you can really count on is the unexpected and that whatever happens, you’ll learn to deal with it. And you learn that the only thing you must truly fear is the great robber baron of all time FEAR itself. So you learn to step right into and through your fears because to give into fear is to give away the right to live life on your terms. You learn that much of life truly is a self-fulfilling prophesy and you learn to go after what you want and not to squander your life living under a cloud of indecision or feelings of impending doom.

Money: The Gateway To Independence & To Self-Determination:

Then, YOU LEARN ABOUT MONEY... the personal power and independence it brings and the options it creates. And you recognize the necessity to create your own personal wealth. Slowly, you begin to take responsibility for yourself by yourself and you make yourself a promise to never betray yourself and to never ever settle for less than your heart’s desire. Then a sense of power is born of self-reliance.

Honor & Integrity:

And you live with honor and integrity because you know that these principles are not the outdated ideals of a by-gone era but the mortar that holds together the foundation upon which you must build your life. And you make it a point to keep smiling, to keep trusting and to stay open to every wonderful opportunity and exciting possibility. Then you hang a wind chime outside your window to remind yourself what beauty there is in Simplicity.

Embracing the Power of Faith:

Finally, with courage in your heart and with God by your side you take a stand, you take a deep breath and you begin to design the life you want to live as best as you can.

A word about the Power of Prayer: In some of my darkest, most painful and frightening hours, I have prayed not for the answers to my prayers or for material things but for my “God” to help me find the strength, confidence and courage to persevere; to face each day and to do what I must do.

Remember this: “You are an expression of the almighty. The spirit of God resides within you and moves through you. Open your heart, speak to that spirit and it will heal and empower you.” My “God” has never failed me.


***After Realizing that I had forgotten to credit the wonderful author of this beautiful poem, I apologize for my forgetful moment. Author Sonny Carroll couldn't have put it better in this great piece of work.

To view More pieces like this and inspire yourself for the better visit:

http://www.sapphyr.net/ *** Thanks for a reminder Sonny -